It's been a while since I wrote about anything. For the past week or so I have been in a downward spiral. I hate depression, I think it is hardest to go from doing great, to feeling like things are falling apart at the seams. I am alone right now in my room on a saturday night. I was at a b-day/b-day part, but there was so much going on I couldn't stand it. There was one person whom I can't stand, one person I'm just extremely hurt by but mostly just too many people. I feel like giving up on everything. I feel alone. I don't know what to do. These are the moments I miss my Mom. I feel unraveled. Does that make sense? I feel loved, I feel support. But, with the things on my plate, I just feel...I feel...just tired. Giving up would be so easy.
I am hoping that going back to school will help me with some of the depression. But the other side of that sword is, I get so stressed with school, it's just the same cycle as before, just a different branch of my tree. I want to go and scream at the top of my lungs AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH